Customary Etiquette When Invited to Fish  on a Friend's Boat

   "Definition of Etiquette" is a code of behavior that delineates expectations for social behavior according to contemporary conventional norms within a society, social class, or group.

    This overview of fishing guest/skipper etiquette is a thought of combining boat-less persons with boaters where a common interest may prove beneficial to both.  This article was put together in hopes that boat-less persons can get together with experienced boaters who share a common interest in fishing.   

    Many times the boat-less person will be shy and not want to intrude, because he/she does not know the fisherman/boater well, or thinks that the boater already has his/her "fishing buddies".    At fishing club meetings or gatherings, not many boaters wear a sign on their backs advertising they would like to make a partnership.  Therefore if you meet someone at meetings, whom you find owns a boat and with whom you have seemingly started a friendship, mention that you don't have a boat and would appreciate an opportunity to join them, should they ever have a spot open.  Or if your boat is smaller and does not lend itself toward a open water fishing trip, this could be a opening to accompany them next time.   You being a newbie to these gatherings, there is however the possibility that this person could be professional guide, where you do not want to be blindsided later.  In this case you might have to temporarily reconsider, and save for an outing with him. 

   On the other hand, many boat owners often welcome someone to go along at times AND to share expenses.  It can get to be a hardship at times for one person to launch, and to recover the boat by ones-self especially from a busy launch site, or on a windy day.  Launching / recovering at a busy ramp by yourself can be intimidating, and personally I try to not use these popular launches at times like this IF AT ALL POSSIBLE.  However sometimes if you want to fish where and when the fish are there, I have to concede.  And some retired fishermen may like company.  They also may have become partially physically handicapped, (we know most fishermen are mentally handicapped) and they can not perform some of the duties as efficiently as they once did, so they possibly could use the help.  They could also have become “gun shy” of having another possible slob aboard who thinks he is so important, brags about his feats all the time, and has his head up his lower anatomy so far that oxygen has to be piped to him to keep him alive.  In this case, many of us as we get older, get less tolerant and get set in our ways, and would rather fish alone.

    Then we come to modesty aboard.  Farts can be expected.  And nature calls are expected also.   With an all male crew, that should be no problem.  Most boats carry a quart jar or bucket that the Coast Guard inspectors also consider as an "Auxiliary Bailing Device".   If the crew is made up of mixed sexes, things could get a little complicated depending on the caliber of the lady.  At times my wife has used a 5 quart plastic painters bucket.  And at times also used a Port-A-Potty under one of my seats.  This is not a open boat, but a canvas topped convertible, which does give some protection from prying eyes if that is what it takes.   However no matter the sex, do not ask me to take you in to the dock so you can use the Sani-Can UNLESS IT IS A DIRE EMERGENCY.  If you have any idea that you may have involuntary premonition of a bowl movement, take care of that BEFORE we leave shore, or in an emergency, use my Port-A-Potty.  Recently I have removed the Port-A-Potty simply because it took up the whole area under the seat.  I now have a slightly modified 5 gallon plastic bucket, that cut down on weight, and can also serve numerous needs along with being a receptacle for storage when under the seat and not in the intended usage.

    With the internet now, the possibility to advertise and accept open seats on fishing boats has opened up a new expanded opportunity for may fishermen, both with boats and without.  This can be a opportunity to find fishing buddy/friends.  It also opens the door for possible incompatibility, so be aware that just because you as a guest had a good time, possibly the skipper may not have shared your thoughts.

   The first time I offered a fishing trip over the internet, it was for a week-end where I was to leave the boat and trailer at this new friend's girl friends parents place Saturday night.  On the water Saturday (1st day of salmon season on MA-2),  we were boarded by a WDFW officer, off a USCG skippered Zodiac boat, with a NOAA compliance officer onboard the Zodiac.  I had been watching this Zodiac working our way through the fleet and when I mentioned "here they come", my invitee sheepishly said, "I left my license at home".    I had him pull his line, stow the rod inside the cabin, and had him sit at the helm as he had not landed a fish yet.  The Zodiac pulled along side, asked permission to board the vessel and as we were still trolling, the zodiac skipper pulled alongside my boat, just in front of the deployed downrigger and the officer boarded my boat.  The officer never said a word to the helmsman, but wanted to see both my and my son's license, plus our fish.  I had limited and was punched out, and while the officer was aboard, there was a fish hit the rod closest to me.  I grabbed it, set the hook, handed it to my son, "saying here is your rod".  The next morning when I picked up the boat that we left at the invitee's location, he bailed with an excuse.

    Some of these trips could be for only a few hours or for a week-end.  Maybe we fishermen are a bit bashful and do not totally get an understanding before departure.  And reimbursing for a fishing trip's expenses should not hinge on whether you caught fish or not.  OK, maybe you were a little strapped for cash at the time, explain that to me and make it up later.   For me, I try not to hold a grudge more than 20 years BUT I do remember quite well under the circumstances, ensuing that that person's name will be slid to the bottom of my fishing partner list and later may just fall off the bottom of this list al together.

    To Me... an offer of an open seat on a fishing boat means that someone is offering you to ride along for sharing costs (gas, bait, etc. which could also include a meal, motel, etc. depending on the circumstances).  It would seem (to me at least) to be totally out of line if the recipient of the offer would think it was for free.  However I have had one of my "friends" walk off the boat, leaving his trash and without even saying thanks, however he did leave me what was left over from his lunch, a few cookies and a 1/2 bag of chips. 

   Now if you feel that since YOU got an invite to go fishing, that the skipper is offering to take you out at HIS expense each time, because HE invited you and that he was going anyway.   WELL READ ON.   You may not receive too many re-invites, unless you happen to be a beautiful, curvaceous, vivacious, intelligent, rich widow, excellent cook and an extremely talented boater/fisher-lady all rolled into one. 

   Then comes the question, how are the fish that are caught shared, (if at all)?  To my way of thinking, if all participants chip in on the expenses, there should be some sort of even disbursement of the spoils.  This would even be that if say three persons were aboard,  (the skipper and two invitees).   One had the hot rod, or by experimenting on bait. water depth etc, OR was just a better fisherman, if he caught all the fish that day, does that mean he keeps all of the catch, by not offering to share?  OK, the captain should be in consideration of some of the spoils, but what about the other guy?  If he was not there on the boat that day, and had not chipped in on expenses, Mr. hot fisherman may not have had the chance to be there at all.

   Yes, this is something that probably should be discussed beforehand, BUT I doubt that it ever happens.  Is this the skippers place to suggest a somewhat sharing of the catch?   Or the odd man out and walk away empty handed.   Sure nothing is guaranteed, BUT ???    Any thoughts here??  On my boat, I try, even by filleting and dividing halves.

SSomeone's fishing buddy Sammy with a couple of nice bass

   Another thing to consider, is that there is a big difference between an invitee on a private boat, than booking with a guide, in that the guide is getting paid for his expertise and use of his boat/rods/reels/bait.  He will often bait your hook and may even let your line out.  He may even set your hook if you are preoccupied (bullshitting with other clients).

   A private fisherman should not have to do all of this for an invitee.  The invitee may have his/her own tackle and hopefully knows how to use it and do their own baiting. 

   Guiding without a license is illegal in most states, so when someone who is not a licensed guide, offers an open seat, he's not expecting to be paid the price of a guide for taking you fishing.  However if after being pushed, and the skipper even sets a price, he can be nailed as at times IF the recipient may turn out to be a undercover law enforcement plant.   Just the same, it's common for fishing buddies who fish together to share some of the expenses.  If one drives his vehicle and brings the boat, his buddy brings lunches, ice, beverages, and bait and they split the fuel bill.  There are any number of ways to make the relationship one of mutual benefit.

    I have recently placed a TIP JAR on my dash right in front of the passenger seat.  Have any of you tried this ??  After a couple of seasons, the donations have improved considerably.

Here is one suggestion to have predominately displayed on your boat

   Those of us who own boats know the expenses that will unexpectedly pop up, like a bad tire on the boat trailer ($130), someone screwed up and did not hold the boat at the launch with the wind blowing, the transducer got hung on a rock or log and broke off ($120).  Your one year old bilge pump on your saltwater boat had a bad seal and seized up over the winter ($50).  Or you wound up with a broken, or lost fishing rod because of the guest.

   It seems that if I am going by myself, I often fish MUCH better, and usually catch more fish.  I usually have a good time too, as I don't have to worry about many things, like are the fish here today and I have to produce, or having to head in early because the invitee had a birthday party for a grandson at 2PM, or of bad weather, or the wife of a guest who was also along, needs to use the restroom, even though I have a port-a-potty onboard. 

    I try to have all my gear ready and can get fishing within minutes of being at the on the water go to destination.  And I am pretty careful who I want to net any fish on my boat, even if I have to hand off my rod, to net my own fish.  However if it is obvious that the fish has to be released because of specie or not being clipped, now is the time to teach a newbie how to net, as if the netting is unsuccessful, at least it was a teaching tool.

    If I have to buy the bait, supply all the gear and wipe somebody's nose, I want some help at least with gas, even just boat gas and/or launch fee, or even with the boat cleanup at the end of the day.   Some people who couldn't wait to go fishing with you, suddenly get alligator arms at the fuel dock...they can't reach their wallets.

    On the other hand, this is like life in general... if you as the skipper didn't ask and didn't receive, that maybe because you didn't make things clear in the first place.   Not all people know what is the right thing to do around a boat, and may be kind of shy about jumping in, grabbing a bow line or wouldn't know where to find the drain plug if you did ask them to check it.   A few skippers say, if you don't ask for assistance, you are just as responsible to the guy who didn't give.   Well, many of us flunked mind-reading school, which can lead to misunderstandings on both sides at times.

Here is examples of fishing trips that can be shared with others, with smiling results

    If you have had the opportunity and enjoyed fishing with boat owners, but yet you continue to remain boat-less for numerous years, and still let it be known that you want to be an invited guest, your name may not move high up on the guest list.   Unless you provide food, your own gear and reimburse fuel expenses.  Remember, you may not be the only one who may be boat-less.   And the boat owners after a while, may like for YOU to share the same joys, responsibilities and expenses that they have of being a boat owner.

   OK, there may be extenuating circumstances that make boat ownership a hardship, like living in a covenanted complex that forbids outside storage at your place of abode, or an apartment with no off-street parking but on street parking of a boat, motor and trailer in some areas is just an invitation for thieves.   But there are rental storage lots or buildings available if you are really motivated.

   A fisherman/boat owner may at times find that his boat is not of a size for a particular outing.  Take for instance, a 24' ocean fishing machine is not the boat to ask to do the job of a 16' river jet sled or drift boat and the other way around.   In instances like this, it may be common for two boater/fishermen to exchange being guests with each other when the need arises.

    Do not be misled into thinking a $5 or even $10 bill at the end of the day is sufficient (especially when the price of gasoline being near or over $5.00 a gallon range) because the skipper was going fishing by himself anyway.  It also makes a difference in the costs incurred if the trip is a river trip where the launch is usually only minutes from the actual fishing area, as compared to a open ocean trip where a 20 mile trip ONE WAY is not uncommon, and the boat could be powered by upwards to twin 200hp motors.  And it would also make a difference if you met the skipper a central location close to home and rode with him the distance to the boat launch.

    Also many of us dedicated fisherpersons find it hard to even financially support our own fishing addiction and have a second job to support it.  This can be especially so for some after retirement.

    Some fishermen will pay $175 - $250+ for a guided fishing trip and not have any qualms of shelling out another $20 or $40 for a tip, but think that you as a recreational boat owner/fisherman are doing it just for the fun of it and since you are running a nice boat that you have an endless money pot.  Most of us that do own any boat have scrimped and saved for many years, and/or could still making payments on it.

    With a 6-gallon can of boat gas running at pushing $30, vehicle gas near or even over $5/gallon, driving distances frequently measured in hundreds of miles, and herring bait $8 a pack, a solid boat invite should always be accompanied by offers to chip in on expenses.   If in doubt as to fuel usage, ask the skipper how much he burns a day on the average trip and then do some basic math on your own.

    It is not just the cost of fuel used for a days of fishing, but the oil mix for the motor if it is a 2 stroke, or oil changes and scheduled maintenance at $125+ an hour if a 4 stroke, fuel for the towing vehicle also has to be added into the equation.   And the newer outboard motors now are pretty much computerized, meaning to do anything, (even adjusting the idle. it has to go to a shop at $85 - $130 an hour).  Of course the towing vehicle will have to be large enough and with enough power to tow said boat.  And usually unless it is a relatively small boat that means no great fuel economy for the towing rig.  Then the boat owner really needs to carry boat insurance, which will run approximately $50 a month.  And do yearly maintenance, which would be another added expense. 

    Trailer maintenance is also a ongoing thing, especially if it is used in saltwater, as for a yearly tear down, replacing wheel bearings and lights.    Even cleaning it up sandblasting and repainting occasionally is needed.

This trailer was used right up to the minute it broke when the boat & trailer skidded to a stop in a farmers fence.  The tongue was only replaced 10 years before.	Obviously not much maintenance care was extended here, & this trailer was used only in upper tidewater far above a lot of salt influence.  Luckily no one was hurt & no damage to the boat or motor.

    Then there is also a launch fee, not to mention the actual cost of the boat and maintaining it.  So you can see that the boat owner may have considerable expenses.   And the thought if he is going fishing anyway, well a $10 tip is sufficient, again, may not get you any re-invites.   After looking at many of my previous trip records and doing some calculating, a reimbursement of $40 for a day of fishing (for two fishermen) is not out of line for a normal day on the water if on a average sized boat/motor.  I have found to offer more in $10 and $20 bills, and let the skipper select what he is comfortable with for any given trip.  However do this discretely, otherwise if you do it in public view, at a busy dock or launch, (especially as you walk off with a bag of fish) it may well give the idea that the skipper is chartering and he may be later contacted by WDFW enforcement.

     Some guests offer to fill your fuel tanks on both the vehicle and boat.  At times this could get excessive, so the skipper needs to be aware and be able to negotiate if need be.  And since the advent of 10% Ethanol fuel, the skipper may also decline refueling the boat at a automotive fuel station, as modern outboards really need Ethanol free fuel OR suffer a high repair bill later.

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Listed below is a excerpt from one of the popular fishing forums on offering an open seat on his boat.

"Typical open seat day in my life:

Fishing Friend calls night before the drift to say wife needs his car and he can't meet at the river.
Says he'll ride with me and help with gas.  "Plus, it'll be fun and it's really not THAT far out of the way for you anyway", he says.
But will he cover the turnaround too, I ask.
"Maybe we can find someone there to haul us back", he interjects.
"Think I'd rather call Frank, it's a long drift and a even longer ride back, since you live in the other direction I normally take", I coolly remind him.
"I suppose", he drones.

Next morning at the put-in. "$35.00 for a turnaround?  That's outrageous!!!!  Highway robbery.  Who does this guy think he is anyway?  A senator?", he loudly proclaims for all present to hear, hoping someone will come to "our" aid and offer a free ride back up.  "It was worth a try and I was just trying to save YOU a few bucks', he later explains (over and over for the next 6 hours).

Before leaving the launch though, I whisper to Frank that dude's drunk, even though he's not.  Frank smiles and nods serenely.  Things are not starting out well, but I'm comforted knowing Frank's got my back covered when we get at the end of the drift.

As we shove off, dude say, "Hope your eggs are better than mine.  Mine were so freezer burned I just tossed 'em in the trash."

While proceeding to mow through 6 of MY Blue Fox spinners, 10 jigs and assorted bobbers, dude attempts to flatter me with comments like, "your sizes, weights, and colors are soooo much better for conditions today".  Finally noticing my concern every time his meat hooks reach down into MY tackle box, he says preemptively, "Maybe we should pull some plugs?"  "Got any pre-wrapped?", he cluelessly inquires.

Later, as we are splitting MY lunch, he barks into the cooler, "is there anything else besides water in here?".  Knowingly full well my boat does not smoke or drink, he lamely adds, "I figured you'd at least have some juice, soda or something besides water, homes."

Finally at the take out, as I'm cleaning the boat AND loading the truck on my own, dude is saddling up to the in-coming guides who are also trying to take care of gear, boats, fish, customers and wives calling to find out if Daddy's going to make it home in time for Johnny's birthday party.   In an effort to win their attention and approval, he says loud enough for me to hear, "I would have done a lot better, if I'd just gone with a guide today.  So?  How'd you guys do?"

When dude finally gets around to jumping in the rig with his mud caked boots, he quickly says, "Don't mind that bit about going with a guide.  It was all BS.  I was just trying to get some good information for you.  Thought maybe it might help US out for NEXT time."   Then with smirk he adds, "Sides, who in their right mind would ever pay for a guide when you can go just as easily for free."

As I'm quietly contemplating the long ride home, dude says sheepishly, "maybe we should stop at the A'deen Jack n' the Crack on the way back. Their 2 fer .99 cents tacos aren't bad.  Plus that turnaround ate most of the $40 bucks I brought for the TA and gas.  I know it doesn't leave much for gas, but you've been so good to me today I sure don't want you to have to buy my dinner too", he says with a grin.

After filling back up with his remaining $5 bucks and my credit card, I opt instead for some decent food at my usual spot.  Dude says, as he wipes super nacho cheese from his beard, "Wow, man you really didn't have to do this.  I'd been fine with J'n'B, really."

Within minutes of getting back on the road, dude is sacked out and snoring with a vengeance.  In spite of his spasmodic anorectic breathing, his final words before going down for the count still ring in my ears;  "Now you let me know if you get tired and want Me to drive, y'hear?  I'm there for ya, man".

So, consoled by the notion that It's the thought that counts and that I would have made the trip anyway, I chalk up another O'fer and push resolutely into the night like Alex, the Ice Road Trucker, dreaming about the next trip.

Fishin' Friends, what would fishing be without 'em?"

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   The following suggestions are not absolute, but represent a set of fairly reasonable "guidelines" that should make you more comfortable with your first few invitational boat trips.  The boat owner also has some responsibilities as explained later.

  When accepting an invitation to fish on someone's boat: 

 (1)    Be at the appointed meeting place on time, or better yet, ten to fifteen minutes early.  If you are late and get left because of you being late, YOU HAVE NOTHING TO COMPLAIN ABOUT.  The boat leaves the ramp at 6:00 AM.

 (2)    Be sure you have a valid fishing license and have it on your person.  Also read the regulations so you have some idea of the current laws.

 (3)    DO NOT bring your whole tackle box, but assemble a mini tackle bag if you must.  A small backpack will hold all your gear, rain clothes and food for a day.   Ask what type of fishing you will be doing and the gear you will need.  And do not bring an extra rod.  Most small fishing boats (under 20') DO NOT have any excess amount of storage space available.

 (4)    Do not bring enough clothes to stay a whole week.  Look at the weather forecast and plan for a day accordingly.  Do however bring warm clothes, rain-gear or a big brimmed hat and sunglasses if the weather may suggest that.

( 5)   Bring your own Personal Floatation Device, (life preserver, to you land-lubbers).   You must understand that if you don't have one, the skipper  MUST provide one, OTHERWISE he gets the citation.   Oh yes, if the skipper is wearing a PDF, doesn't it make sense that you should wear one also. 
 

 (6)    If bringing a child, (approve it with the skipper beforehand) ask and make certain a child size PFD is available, if not then bring one that fits the child with you.  The law says children under 12 MUST be wearing a PFD while aboard a vessel.  

   If you do bring children on your trip, also be aware that boat ramps are extremely dangerous places, during the day or in the wee hours.   Do not let kids walk around unattended on ramps or the docks.  If you do bring a child with you, be sure they are wearing a properly fitted PFD from the moment before they step on the dock, to the time they return to dry land. 

 (7)    Do not bring uninvited guests, which could even extended to include your dog.  Most personal fishing boats encountered will be 20' or less where fishing space can be a concern.  If the skipper had planned on only you, and you then drag along your brother-in-law and his 12 year old son, possibly the boat could be overloaded, or not enough room even for the skipper to even fish himself.   Been there, had that happen to me, and was totally surprised when the invitee showed up with his father-in-law for a week's vacation on my boat, and where I had also invited my son, and my max capacity was 3 persons.

 (8)    If you bring food/coffee/snacks for yourself, consider bringing enough to offer to the others on the trip also.  If you drop part of your doughnut on the deck, pick it up, uneaten food on the deck gets squashed kicked, and usually washed into the bilge.   DO NOT bring peanuts or sunflower seeds in the shells, they raise havoc with bilge pumps.   Also potato chips always seem to find parts of themselves on the deck, or worse could be Cheatos, which when associated with moisture leave an orange stain.  I even had one old guy eat his hard boiled eggs and left many of the egg shells on the deck.  Were was he born, or lives in a barn? 

 (9)   Ask if you need to bring your own tackle, lures, bait, etc.  Bring only what the skipper agrees to, as cluttered boats can very well lead to a safety problem.  Most fishing boats of the size we will be using here have LIMITED storage space.  Do not bring extra rods, the skipper will probably have an extra anyway.  If you do bring some of your own gear, DOWNSIZE to a very small gear bag and be minimal.   CLICK HERE for an article on what it takes to create a small "Go To" bag.
 

Does this look familiar ??

(10)   If bait is going to be used, offer to bring it for the whole boat, but inquire as to exactly what size and whether it should be fresh or frozen.  Ask the best place to purchase the freshest bait in that area.

(11)    Ask before lighting up a cigarette.   Do you usually smoke while sitting on a 40 gallon gasoline tank.   Ask first -- dummy.

(12)   One gripe most skippers have is invitees who jump in the boat with dirty shoes.   If on a river boat or sled, that launches off a gravel beach, or muddy launch this doesn't mean the skipper really wants a boat full of mud, sand or both, which he has to clean up at the end of a long day.   So sitting on the gunwale before actually climbing into the boat, just do a little dip the shoe soles in the water or scrape, it's all it takes to clean most fresh mud off.  A wet deck dries off, but mud/dirt stays.

In the photo below, when the invitee was ribbed (by me) about leaving a muddy deck, his comment was that he had Arthritis in his knees/feet.  My return comment was  "You are not alone, and Tylenol works for me".

Does this look familiar ??